Thursday, March 6, 2014

Winter's End


My mind is off in distant places lately, a byproduct of winter seizing an already frozen heart. I prefer the mind bending alternate endings I create in the cold, and nothing less is to be expected am I to be its formidable foe.  Idle time is definitely the devil's canvas and these idle hands, God damn if I can handle them.  People like me don't change, except for the change I affect in you. I'll always do too much of something, that shit's written in my dna, with a family full of drunken alcoholics it's appalling I didn't end up sideways myself.  It's my philosophy that I'ma addict so I might as well choose my battles while I'm at it.  That doesn't necessarily mean any drugs will enter my bloodstream, it's more a frame of mind, so to speak.  You remove the drugs you still have an addict, it's a simple matter of fact that I can turn even you into a bad habit.  I'm a junky for words and all their intricate avenues creating poems and ballads, this beautiful framework as I blather about habits.

And that was only a moment of clarity.
What can I say?

Writing anything recently has been a challenge, it's part of a cycle I seem to go through, which is cool, I don't trip about it anymore.  It is what it is, and I figure when it's ready it'll come back, and it does.  Winter is dark and especially so with the hours I work, it starts fucking with me after a while. The only difference is now I know what it is, and to a certain extent it helps me control the way I deal with it, but it seems as if nothing can prevent it from happening.  Winter here is dragging on, almost as if it's speaking to me personally, but fuck that, I'll make it through. I always do.  Besides, I've got a few ideas steeping in my head which is plenty to get me through until the cold ends.  It's only a matter of time, perhaps even just weeks before it'll break.  We have survived the longest part of it, I do believe. 

2 comments:

  1. Hey you.

    I feel you on the whole writing anything lately being a challenge. The only love affair that ever really lasts in the one with writer's block.

    I feel like a bad habit.

    Miss ya.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Sigh. Writing anything has really been a challenge. Whatever the hell is wrong with us.
    First time on your blog, btw. It's nice. :D

    ReplyDelete